Have A Great Weekend!

btw: elliott, i found your missing nana.

greetings from the high seas

i received an email from b. lew with this message:
"I'm on a boat, betch."

and attached was this picture:

vultures. jackals.

issuezzz

new show. july 15. enjoy.

Michael & Michael Have Issues	Premieres Wed, July 15, 10:30pm / 9:30c
Preview - Greg the Intern
www.comedycentral.com
Joke of the Day Stand-Up Comedy Free Online Games

Jamon!

If Michael Jackson were alive today he would wish Steven a Happy Birthday. You should too. Happy Birthday you SOB.

You Know What July Is?

Yes, Folks. July is National Ice Cream and Hot Dog month. It is also National Cell-Phone courtesy month. So all yous out there who scream into your cellphones in confined public spaces or text msg back and forth under ze table on a boring date, watch it! If you don't believe me, click on the link below. None of y'all believed in National Pi Day either... For a full list of July holidays, check here. I especially like Pandemonium Day. I'm sure Elliott likes Embrace your Geekness Day and I'm sure Steven likes the Video Games Day. Back to the the Hot Dog, the Hot Dog has so many origin stories that scientists and historians can't put a place on when this delicious food phenomenon started. According to wiki, the term "dog" has been used as a synonym for sausage since at least 1884 and accusations that sausage makers used dog meat date to at least 1845. And Ice Cream has been around since the days of Mesopotamia and Ancient Egypt. Oh yeah, July is also host to National Lasagna day and then quickly followed by National Cheesecake day. July sure is a month for gluttonizing with food. Glutton, ho!

Freedom MothaF*ckas!

Homer: Yeah, um, give me one of those porno magazines, a large box of condoms, a bottle of Old Harper, a box of panty shields... [rapid undertone] and some illegal fireworks...[normal voice] and one of those disposeable enemas. You know what, make it two.

America, f*ck yea.

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

i rove you!

wasn't this a past uppercut post?

In the name of freedom and blowing up a small piece of your homeland here's some great pictures of the freedom hating Kim Jong ILL. I found these to be hilarious. There's more here. Happy Fourth of July Uppercutters!

celebrate!

i know this past week has been rife with tragedy. RIP ed, farrah, michael, and billy. but there is a really great reason to smile today. 26 years ago on this very day, our own star was born. a very happy birthday to the one and only b. lew. what a fine young lady she has blossomed into!

we are honored to pay tribute to the sassy, snarky, high-heeled clad, curly-haired, carb-loving lady of south berry. in keeping with b's own tradition of biting wit, i offer her this cake. i slaved over it all morning:

but alas i am not completely without a heart- it's chocolate! and your real present is a carefully crafted collage of the most influential figures in the past decade- in trucker hats. proof that everyone makes mistakes.

happy birthday!!!